Navigashun

I have never been a fan of Mini Driver. I am a Nancy Naysayer. I love me some JPS; GPS, don't get me started.

Color me O.L.D. Give me some good old fashioned Migratory Accordion Paperwork. That's MAP for you young textual acronymphs. Origami for the cartographically challenged.

Yeah, Nancy and I had a love/hate relationship. She hated when I got off route, and I loved to tell HER where to go.

"Arrive at destination" was more of a loose interpretation. Once, twice, three times Lady, I sat bolt upright from a deep nap, looked out the windshield, and proclaimed, "THIS ISN'T THE TIME STATION! It's 3 miles down the road at a Go Mart on the right." Chew on that Nagging Nancy.

There were countless recalculating pauses along the roadside, the broken computer screen, a lost route book. Hath no fear; GPS is no match for our Sleepigator. She, too, will make an appearance before race end.

More than one driver forgot the correct usage of U.S. Joe Road Sign. "Stay on 54" does not mean "Go straight 54 miles". My bad, I should have been more specific.

How 'bout the time I heard "right down the road" and awoke to a hokey pokey sensation, no store in sight? The blind leading the blind out, trusting no more than a vertigo stricken Nancy? "Turn right in .4 mile. Turn left in .2 mile. Please proceed to the highlighted route." The subsequent game of Fuck, Fuck, Truce?

"Did anyone get that on film?" As the vehicles and riders swarmed Time Station 23 like clowns in tiny cars, team CBS scribe struggled to keep up. "Could you repeat that for the script?" And they say this stuff doesn't write itself.

This could very well be the next Great Amazing GrrrRace. Part Survivor, part Big Brother, part Abbott and Costello.

Who's at the time station first?
What? Wait a second.
I don't know, where's TS23?

Could I please vote someone out of Arvee?