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Metrobus has earned the nation’s top bus safety award because of its safety record and aggressive safety programs. Bus operators receive refresher training, focusing primarily on safety, every two years.

Well one word in there is right on point. It’s smack dab in the middle of the gobbly goo. It rhymes with imustlive. Imustlive is a synonym of the word, but in stark contrast with the statement’s sentiment as a whole.

Oh, and I haven’t consulted any Metro documents, but I’m gonna go out on a proverbial limb, tuck in close to protect a limb, and say bus #6413 is due for review. Just a guess. But a stab. A mere hypothesis.

There was some honking. More than necessary I might add. Some aggressive driving. Some cutting off. Following too close. Pulling out too soon. You know, a regular day in the city playing chicken with an award winning Metrobus. Swerving Ass, Flooring it, Edging off the road, Toot tooting, Yv.

Beep, Beep, Yeah! Look at you! Loud, toxic, obnoxious. I hear you, I smell you, sometimes I even feel you. God knows I can see you over and over and over. Quiet your horn you Professional Gashole. Toot de suite!

But here you are out and about on July 4th weekend. It’s a holiday I know. It's what you do. Celebrating your oil dependence, while I roll around pedaling independence. Some how my mere existence a thorn in your tire.

It’s Washington DC, you have every right to protest. Toot. Toot. PEDAL YOUR FEET OUTTA OUR STREET. WE’RE HERE, WE STEER, GET USED TO IT…OR GET HIT.

Original-ish. Rhythmic-ish. Boldly American. Shazizzle.