Well who shoved a chunk of coal up your tailpipe?Never mind Lillian Leadfoot came barrelling by a playground in a residential neighborhood. She also launched her 'cedes off the asphalt traffic mesa meant to slow Naughty Nancy to a trot.
Intersecting with me, menacing the bike trail, Gunnin' Granny grinded to a halt. There she was straddling the anti-speed butte, preCARiously teetering above Whoville, thistletoe swinging from her dashboard.
She was a dead giveaway, but she could have stuck a peppermint stick in my bike wheel...I was oblivious. I took it as goodwill. Godspeed Biker Girl.
HO, HO, HOnk!
Really? You invite me to pass then blast a horn in my ear as I go? GrannyGopherGuts! That was mean. You could put an ear out!
Then all of a sudden, piercing the bustling holiday air, there arose such a clatter...again with the horn? SCREECHING....SKIDDING....CRUNCHO!
I peered 'round my shoulder to find Kris Crinkle in the middle of a Santa Jam about a block back. Thank the blue haired biddy for spreading her holiday jeer...or a second later and I would have been a flattened hood ornament.
1 comment:
Coal up the tailpipe is a serious medical condition. That's why we recommend a good chimney sweeping along with the colonoscopy when people turn 50. If the coal turns to diamonds, we split it 50/50 with the patient.
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